Morning Meds, Day 12

Morning Meds

Day 12—Special Needs Edition

I only write love poems

The kind that no one reads

The kind that makes you look like you are sick or you're diseased

I only write love poems

Because I am in love

Won't apologize or compromise or

Be silent like a dove

Rhyming or couplets or limericks alike

I just can't seem to shake my plight

Of un-marketability and shame

Crazy enough to love

That is my name

Last week was a big week for our family. Two of us were featured in our Local paper, celebrated for our signature strengths and the things we love to do most. Pretty exciting stuff! 

My article

Christian's article

In the article about Christian I was so excited that the reporter quoted me as saying that I believe we all have special needs. Most people would agree we're all special which makes that statement not too controversial, I suppose. 
So ride the short bus with me this morning as I tell you mine. Even as much as I preach this Idea I think it's so normal to feel uncomfortable with the things you feel you need that no one else seems to. Me too.
I've noticed that I need "a container" of sorts for the love in my heart. It's always felt wrong to me because I had an image of love as a river and you needed a situation like the Nile where there's movement in and out, otherwise it would be like The Dead Sea, stagnant and disease - infested. So I asked God for further explanation and He said my love right now is just a seed and only needs good soil. And that's what I have and all that I have and need. Coupled with acceptance it's truly all I need in this moment and it's all I have.
I don't think I told a good story today but I have a communication style that I've learned and want to reveal. My strategy is to open a vein to my audience/reader and let them watch me bleed, then hand them the knife. 
Now you can wipe it off, but you know what's coming. I have found self-examination happens better with role modeling and a loving friend. I hope to be that to you and help you advocate for your own special needs.

Love is a seed

How can I sow it

And expect you to grow into my arms

Clinging

Desperate

A complete embrace of God's purpose for our lives

Love is a seed

Your soil is deep

Rich

Enigmatic

Drawing me in

Pulling your love out of hibernation into the sun where it's warm

Free

And healed

Love is a seed into the future

Tomorrow is a promise

Rarely kept

And though Faith and Hope may fade and fall

Love is a seed

And love never dies

Morning Meds, Day 11

Morning Meds, Day 11

OF ELEVATOR SPEECHES & INSPIRATION Back in the elevator I stand Empty words and open hand Hoping to receive a revelation On how to start this conversation How to express the thing I do That it might reach out to you And connect to the need you Don't know you have But 30 seconds isn't enough time to apologize if I make you sad So instead of a human do May you find a human be(e) Too heavy to fly but hoping to meet you in the air Ending with a handshake or a blank stare “I'm Felicity and I inspire people who are frustrated to think more clearly so they can achieve their goals.” I was challenged the other day to encapsulate what I do into a short phrase. The word inspiration came out and with the structure I was given…that is what I said.* It's fun to know what you're about. Some of my favorite exercises have been around this thought. In a women's Bible study I was a part of we were asked to choose one word to describe us. I chose free. Mike Murdock said, “Your greatest legacy would be to have your name associated with one word.” Mike Murdock – Wisdom Oral Roberts - Healing Billy Graham - Souls Felicity - Inspiration What word do you hope to leave the world? I'd love to hear it (and let me know if I can post it so the world can know what they're in for :-) ) *Shout out to Yvonne Chihak of http://mogulmomacademy.com/ and the Grow Your Tribe challenge!

Morning Meds, Day 10

Morning Meds—Born for This

Day 10

This weekend my relationship with my 11 year old daughter got a needed boost.  She and I work so hard on our relationship in counseling sessions that have been incredibly helpful. This weekend, however, I made a quantum leap in my appreciation for my daughter and how fearfully and wonderfully made she is.

I never would have expected this of a beauty pageant. Before this weekend I wasn’t even sure how I felt about them. Now I see them as a celebration of feminine beauty and the volunteer spirit that women so bountifully nurture in the world. I also see it as the place where I saw Michaela truly thrive. I’ve never seen her so naturally good at anything. She’s a good actor, enthusiastic singer, quite awesome dancer and even choreographer. But there’s no comparison to how good she was on that stage this weekend.

I saw her be industrious, completely committed, humble, a good friend and a great sport when she lost. She even agreed with the judge’s choice of a winner. Many of these qualities are things I don’t get to see from my daughter a lot, but in the right soil, this seed grew with Miracle Grow.

So I’m proud and I’m in awe. In the same year that Christian fully claimed his love of acting (and was actually interviewed this week about it in a local paper), and the same year that I found my love of life coaching (We were actually interviewed at the same time!) Michaela too finds her perfect match.

I think one of the best things about knowing what you were born for, is it even makes your weaknesses look like strengths. There’s a reason to appreciate yourself. We work towards balancing our weaknesses, but there’s a place where they are so unnecessary, and that’s why you were given them in small measure. Be proud of who you are, in awe of who God made you, and scared of me hitting you up for Michaela’s next sponsored competition! (You saw me coming, right? J)

Michaela's Pageant Weekend

Morning Meds, Day 9

Morning Meds, Day 9

Different,Yet the Same So I had to ask Christian, “Do you feel any different, I mean since you’ve been taking the Protandim? (“You know, since you haven’t been stomping around here and screaming like a madman? But I didn’t say that part.”) And, in true teenage form he looked at me like I’d grown a second head and said “Nooo.” I didn’t understand so well until Monday night when I had a huge revelation and a change on the inside of my own. Something I’ve been struggling with forever and I finally gave up thinking I wasn’t achieving for a lack of effort. I’d given PLENTY of effort, but I was bankrupt and giving 100% of nothing doesn’t yield much progress. After admitting that a month or two ago, God was finally able to do something with me…pretty strong and powerful, aligning my desires with His, making His command seem like my idea! He’s amazing that way…something I’ve struggled with for so long will never be a problem again. Only God. When He wins me over this way I swear I’ll never go back, back to pleasing people on the outside but being disconnected on the inside. I don’t care if I look a mess, if I truly am a mess then that’s the important thing to change. And that’s why I admire my son, if he’s a mess you’ll know it. He’s not afraid to be the same on the inside and out. He doesn’t always know how to improve something, but he’ll let you know when something needs improvement. If you were to ask me, I’d have to say I don’t feel any differently either. I’ve always felt whole and right, but now I am more whole and more right. I’m happier, but I’m also the same because my rightness doesn’t come from me, but from the Son of God (the real one, not the movie one :-) Felicity

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Morning Meds, Day 8

Morning Meds, Day 8

The Middle of a Miracle

A dear friend asked me a very important question over the summer, “What is it that you’re really expecting from Christian?”

Wow, right between the kisser! Why, you ask? Because I had gotten lazy in my expectation. I was beat down from every manifestation that this diagnosis of Autism was bringing. More crazy outbursts, more teenage hormones with a monster-like twist, more withdrawal from society, more isolation in the home, more claiming to want friends and never talking to any. I was getting beat down when I said I would keep my expectations high.

And now. What can I say? I’m in the middle of a miracle I didn’t deserve. I was just listening to The Script’s song today, “When a heart breaks, it don’t breakeven.” I repented and God of course has the bigger part of my heart and he’s gracing our family to watch Christian become free of autism one step at a time.

Of course I have no idea how far this will go. I just know my son and I agreed to politely disagree with his teacher that told him he’ll live in assisted living the rest of his life. I told him if he can prove he has the skills to live on his own he’ll live on his own one day…and that is his desire. The first profession he ever listed he wanted to have was that of Father. And if that’s what he wants, I believe that’s what he’ll have.

The miracle is born of science, but it is a miracle still. A miracle I ever found out about this product and a miracle that I can help spread the word to others. If I haven’t called you yet about it, forgive me…I don’t mind you beating me to the punch. You’re on my short list to testify to. I have much work to do to catch up to what God is doing.

And if you’re not sick of me yet (please pace yourself…I’m just getting started!) I’ll be doing a tour of sorts in Google Hangouts, starting this Wed. at 3pm Central Time on WOAMTEC live, a national women’s networking group. I’m not sure what I’ll be talking about, but I hope I get to mention my miracle…if not I know you’ll see it beaming off my face.  Just click below on Wed. to watch…or look for it on YouTube if you can’t make it at that time.

Just remember when it happens to you…the phrase “Delay is not denial” will no longer be a cliché.

March 5 Broadcast with Ta-Tanisha on WOAMTEC Live!